How To Give Good Advice And Feedback

David Blog
by David Blog
Sep 12, 2019 发布于 5:46 PM

Hey guys, it is very good to give honest feedback to friends and colleagues for them to improve themselves. Constructive criticism helps people grow, and most of us have been on the receiving end, understand how much it benefits us. However, most of us don’t know how to give proper constructive criticism and may end up hurting other people’s feelings. Here’s 5 steps on how to give good feedback for the benefit of both parties.



  1. Ask for Permission

  • This actually makes A LOT of difference.

  •  A simple “Hey, do you have a minute for some quick feedback?” can help the receiver be mentally ready for it, be it positive or negative.



  1. State What You Observed

  • Where possible, use specific examples and avoid being judgmental. 

  • For example…

    • “You don’t give off a lot of energy during meetings” is not as helpful as, “In the meeting with Mr. Teng yesterday, I noticed you seem quite tired and quiet.”



  1. Explain The Impact

  • Point out the direct impact that resulted from this behavior, and again be as specific as possible. 

  • For example…

    • Saying, “When you called the meeting to an end without leaving time for discussion, it made me feel like you did not value the team’s input” or “I noticed that the clients were upset” is much more effective than  “ You are wrong and unprofessional for not letting us have time to discuss after the meetings.”

  • Statements like “it made me feel” and “I noticed that” are more difficult to argue with, and using those phrases will keep the feedback session from devolving into a debate.



  1. Pause

  • When you’ve said what is on your mind, stop.

  • Then ask for the other person’s opinion. 

  • Give them time to think through what you’ve said and react to it.



  1. Suggest Solid Next Steps

  • Give a small number of actionable suggestions (ideally only one or two) that the other person can take in the future, to change this behavior. 

  • They will appreciate that you’re giving them the first step to improving the situation.


To help you all further, here is a checklist of what good and positive feedback should have/ look like.

  • Choose one issue at a time! Focusing on too many behaviors at once is confusing and overwhelming, and can feel like an all-out attack.
  • Don’t be too critical or focus too heavily on the negative. Feedback should inspire the other person to improve, not make them feel bad in where they went wrong. Giving a piece of good feedback with negative feedback makes it easier to swallow.

  • But don’t avoid real problems, either. If there’s an issue, don’t be afraid to state it.

  • Avoid vagueness. Use specific examples, and connect those behaviors to the impact they have.

  • Leave plenty of time for the recipient of your feedback to ask or answer questions and respond to what you’ve said.